PG-13, 600 words
Summary: Remus and Sirius arrive at the Potters, and discover what Lily is really like when eight months pregnant.
At about four o’clock, Sirius skids the motorbike into the Potters’ driveway, sending shards of stone flying in all directions. He revs up and leans on to the back wheel, and Remus tightens his grip around his waist so as not to fall off.
After roaring the engine outrageously for half a minute, the door flings open and James stands there, all smiles, though Sirius can’t help but note the bags under his eyes.
‘Moony and Padfoot! Fabulous! Come in, come in.’
They troop inside, taking great care to scrape their muddy shoes against the doormat and then dump their bags in the hallway before shuffling inside.
James shepherds them towards the kitchen, muttering ‘Anything Lily might say or do is perfectly normal and not to be questioned, ok? For all our sakes.’
Sirius hopes for something truly odd, like Lily in mis-matched leg warmers or something, and so it is a little disappointed to see all she is occupied with at the moment is tucking into a full English breakfast.
‘Mm, that looks good,’ he says. ‘And full of nutrients too! Harry’s a lucky, lucky boy in there.’
‘Or Rose,’ Remus adds automatically. They’ve got quite the little double act going on now.
‘Peter should be along soon – think he’s waiting until after rush hour to Floo over,’ explains James, before moving to clear Lily’s plate at an imperious nod.
Lily beams and gets up – a process which seems far more complicated than Sirius would have believed.
She moves forward and administers an affectionate peck on the cheek to each of them. ‘Remus, your room is the one next to James and me; Sirius, you’re in the attic.’
There’s a silence. Sirius gapes at Lily in horror, but she looks all innocent hostess. ‘I don’t wish to pass judgement on your personal lives, but I’m trying to bring a child into the world here, so I’d prefer no behaviour of that nature while you’re under this roof.’
Sirius just stares at her, and out of the corner of his eye he can see Remus flushing.
James cackles and walks over, patting them both on the shoulder rather patronisingly. ‘She’s joking – you’re both in the usual room.’
‘Damn you, James! I was just getting started there…’ Lily said with a devilish twinkle. ‘Remus, your face! Oh, bless you both, you’ve just made my day.’
‘Glad to be of service,’ Sirius mutters, feeling like an idiot.
‘Will beans on toast be sufficient recompense?’ James asks.
‘It’s hardly dinner time,’ Lily replies, sounding for all the world like a less Scottish version of McGonagall.
Sirius has to bite his tongue very literally and very hard not to point out Lily had just missed the breakfast slot by quite some time.
‘Tea would do nicely, thanks,’ says Remus, stepping in.
James bustles out, and Sirius glares at Lily. ‘You are evil. Pure evil. I’m going to get you for that!’
Lily just places a hand on her stomach and looks saintly. ‘Sirius – I am with child! You can’t possibly ‘get me’ for anything.’
Remus laughs. ‘Oh dear, Padfoot, you’re rumbled. You’ve been using to get Prongs to run around after your for months, haven’t you, Lily?’
‘Oh yes,’ she answers, smiling sweetly.
‘I knew we should have let girls be Marauders,’ Sirius hissed to Remus.
James returns with a tray of tea, and Lily takes a cup and sits down delicately, allowing James to pour out her milk and spoon in an awful lot of sugar.
‘Genius,’ murmurs Sirius in awe. ‘Pure genius.’